Duff Energy Drink
Okay, so sometimes I am a sucker for clever advertising. I was at Newbury Comics at the checkout line and there were cans of Duff Energy Drink at the impulse section of the register plane. I was sold! The can looked just like cans of Duff Beer from the Simpsons. How cool!
I got the can home and took a closer look at the ridiculous purchase I had made. It brought a few questions to my mind. First, why had I been so weak? Even I employ these sorts of guerilla marketing tactics at the shop, putting enticing objects near the register for a quick grab-and-go. Second, why would you make a Duff Energy Drink, as the actual Duff is beer, and it does the opposite of energize. Oh well.
The drink was a 12 oz. portion with 160 calories and 40 grams of sugar. So far, off to a good start. It included piles of B-vitamins, taurine, caffeine, guarana, inosiol, and ginseng, so I was ready for some fun. When I poured this into a glass, there was an initial explosion of carbonation, resulting in a big fluffy head that died quickly. The beverage was bright orange, and seemed to be glowing from the neon color. It tasted like an orange freezepop with small, fizzy bubbles. It actually wasn’t as bad as many energy drinks I’ve tried, though it was VERY sugary. After the fizz, the drink leaves an oily mouthfeel and a bitter citrus finish that is quick to fade. This was unpleasantly followed by a cheesy plastic aftertaste that made you want to drink more to cover it up. Nothing about this tasted natural.
Well, that’s about it for Duff Energy Drink. A novelty can with glowing orange energy soda that tastes 100% processed. It must have been a by-product of the