Apples: A Rebuttal

A couple months ago I put together an article basically giving my thoughts on the four most popular apples in New England. I caught a bit of flack for this from an unexpected place: my mother. She said that I was doing a disservice to the apple-eating populous by not reviewing what she felt were some of the best apples in existence; namely the Gala, Pink Lady, Grapple, and Fuji. She went as far as to mail me a box sampling these four fruits all the way from San Antonio, how could I say no?

First in the lineup was the Gala. This apple is light for its size and very crispy with medium firmness. It tastes sweet and slightly perfumed. The texture is just slightly mealy, but definitely not undesirably so. My fellow taster Jenny summed it up best as an apple with a Macintosh consistency and a Red Delicious flavor.

Secondly was the Grapple, touted to be a fruit that looks like an apple and smells like a grape. I don’t know who thought the world needed this evil, genetically-modified, and no-doubt super-intelligent fruit, but here it was. The smell of this little guy permeated the box of apples, a scent very much like artificial Concord grape. These apples were the smallest of the lot, pretty soft, with the texture of a winter Macintosh. They taste kind of like grass and are very sweet on the attack. Overall, the Grapple is kind of gross and not something I’d ever like to try again.

Third was the Pink Lady, my mother’s personal favorite. These apples smelled great, like Jenny put it, they smelled like autumn. The scent is fresh and just a little like dry dead leaves, not in a bad way. The Pink Lady is exceptionally crisp and sweet with a pleasant tartness. This apple would make tremendous juice or cider. It tasted so good it almost made me forget all about the Grapple whose grapey smell was creeping around my apartment like the fog that turns people inside out. The Pink Lady was easily my favorite of the bunch so far, but we had one more to go.

Finally, the Fuji was ready to go. Now these are ugly little apples, streaked brown, red, green, and yellow. The skin was very tough for an apple and although they were the juiciest of the four, they had very little flavor, apple or otherwise. It’s possible that being in close quarters with the mutant Grapples for a cross-country trip had put them in a bad mood. The simple fact is that I would not go out of my way to eat a Fuji in the future.

With all the apples having been tasted, I found myself inexorable drawn back to the Pink Lady, the clear winner. I had a great time tasting these apples and fulfilling a viewer request, if in the future anyone wants me to give my educated opinion of something you love to eat, just drop me a line, you know where I can be reached.

This tasting was made a lot more pleasant by the presence of an ice cold bottle of Prosecco and a healthy chunk of Connoisseur Jon’s homemade Cheddar cheese, which will be covered in an upcoming review. The Prosecco is a dry Italian sparkling white wine that I am quite particular towards, especially because the corner store down the street always has some in stock for my special occasions. The taste is dry and yeasty, but not offensively so. It pairs well with a sharp cheese or garlicky dinner.