Name: Tomas Swift

Age: 28

Sign: Sagittarius

Marital Status: In a relationship

Education: Programming, writing, art, and theatre classes at Emerson College and UNH. No degree… too broke.

Occupation: I.T. Technician for a Boston accounting firm

Hobbies: Playing my drums, listening to music, doing art, webmastering this site, reading, philosophizing, watching movies, playing video games, nerding it up, and cooking.

Areas of Expertise: Liquor, Mixed Drinks, Cheese, Caffeine, Music, Vocabulary, Stand-up Comedy.

Soft Spot for:  A well-made Tom Collins, spicy food, good comedic timing, precision drumming, Mountain Dew, film noir, perspicacity, lounge culture, zombies, pirates, and first-rate character acting.

Anger caused by: The culture of ignorance, bland food, commercialized iconography, people who confuse regurgitating lines they’ve heard on TV with actual wit.

Connoisseur Tom is the twin brother of Connoisseur Jon, the childhood friend of Connoisseur Guiou, and the former roommate of Connoisseur Javier. He spent his formative years in and about various one-horse towns in Maine, and though he looks upon the bucolic splendor of the Northlands with great fondness, he loves the urban vibrancy of living in Boston.  There’s a lot of story left to write on these pages, but he’ll get into all that later.

Name: Jon Swift

Age: 28

Sign: Sagittarius

Marital Status: Married

Education: B.A. in Theatre Education, Emerson College 2003

Occupation: Personal Banker

Hobbies: Brewing Beer, Cooking, Gaming, Medical Studies, Community Service, Home Improvement

Areas of Expertise: Beer, Coffee, Desserts, Customer Service

Soft Spot for:  Happy Hour Menus, Excessive Carbohydrates, Hops, Strong Cheese

Anger caused by: Bad Service, Over-priced Appetizers, Inedible Garnish.

Name: Michael Guiou

Age: 27

Sign: Gemini

Marital Status: Serially Single (I know, I’m shocked too)

Education: B.M. Syracuse University, Setnor School of Music

Occupation: Wine Importer

Hobbies: Cooking, Wine, Yoga, Movies, Reading, The Art of Polite Conversation

Areas of Expertise: Wine, Vegetarian and Health Food, Seafood, Classical Music

Soft Spot for:  Sci-Fi Flicks, Spicy Food, Kitchen Gadgets, Dinner Parties, Small Details

Anger caused by: Bad Service, Weak Drinks, Superfluous Ornamentation

Born in sunny South Carolina, Connoisseur Guiou was soon transplanted to his family’s ancestral home of Maine, where he would remain till his 18^th year.  It was in Maine, under the firm tutelage and firm hands of grandparents and various aunts and uncles that he came into his own as Connoisseur of the finer things in life.  Being a vegetarian for over 10 years he slowly refined his palate through a deprivation of heavier tasting foods, learning to discern the more mild and delicate herbs, spices, and flavors.  Mr. Guiou has since come back to light, if you will, and now enjoys all food groups.  Connoisseur Guiou has been studying classical music since an early age and continues to practice and occasionally perform when the time and opportunity present themselves.  Throughout his life he has been compared with many figures of history, including, but not limited too:  Alexander the Great, Cleopatra, Aristotle, Galileo, and more recently Joel Grey and Queen Elizabeth.  He strives to incorporate fine living into all aspects of his life; currently he is on a health kick, balancing his diet and attending yoga classes daily.   

Name: Javier Loustaunau

Age: 29

Sign: Scorpio

Marital Status: Engaged

Education: Some coursework completed: Biochemical Engineering specializing in food science; Sushi and Japanese Cooking courses completed at Casa Elina.

Occupation: Fraud investigator for a bank.

Hobbies: Modding games, Writing to editors, Poetry, Fiction, Filling the gaps on IMDB and other movie sites.

Areas of Expertise: Beer, International cuisine, Cinema, Heavy Metal

Soft Spot for:  Feel-bad Movies, Spicy food, Musical show-offs, Strategy games, Know-it-all non fiction.

Anger caused by: Fake Mexican food, Opportunist remakes/adaptations, Waste

Born and raised in Mexico, I eventually dropped out of college to work in the US and help support a person I was dating at the time. This landed me in Boston which has become my new home and home to my many addictions: spicy curries, culture festivals, microbrewery beer, independent movie theaters and nasty bar food. 

One of my main passions is cooking. Even before I knew how to light a match I was fascinated with what went on in the kitchen and I would use rolled up pieces of newspaper to light the stove. Now that I am well acquainted with fire I have developed a passion for Chinese cuisine which I often mix with my Cajun and Mexican heritage to produce playfully spicy, bright and comforting dishes.